I was hanging out with a girl tonight, dressed all nice and casual, since it's my day off. She told me I ought to take some pics for my website dressed like I was, with (and I quote) "all those muscles bulging everywhere." No, I really don't know what she was talking about, but I was willing to go with it.

I don't think she was looking at my pants, so I assumed she was talking about my sleeveless shirt. As you know, flattery will get you everywhere with me, so I posted a couple more pics in the photos section of the website. I didn't shave for it, but I did just get a haircut. Not that it makes too much of a difference.

When I was getting the haircut, the lady kept asking me if I wanted to trim or wax my eyebrows. Now, I don't get haircuts too often (or I didn't use to, at least), but that seemed like a really odd question. Especially by the third time she brought it up. Now I'm going to be paranoid about having bushy eyebrows.

Today was my friend Alvin's Birthday. If you're reading this, Happy Birthday, Alvin! Yeah, I'm too cheap to buy you a freakin' card. Tell you what, next time I see you, I'll spring for a Heineken.

I just read Terry Pratchett's "Monstrous Regiment." I was rather disappointed. As a comedy, it wasn't all that funny. As social commentary, it wasn't that on target. And story wise, it was very, very predictable. Maybe I've been reading too much of his stuff. Oh well, it could be worse; he could be Nicholas Sparks.

Well, that's the news from this front. How go things in your neck of the woods?

Well, I finally took some pics with my digital camera, so that everybody can see my short hair. And I found out I'm even less photogenic than I had thought I was. For such an incredibly good looking guy, I always look like such a goober in photos.

I thought Anna was giving me the silent treatment. Turns out she had extenuating circumstances. For the record, I am in favor of extenuating circumstances, and against getting the silent treatment. And you can quote me on that, should you ever so desire.

I still have hopes she'll be coming up to visit next week. Not expectations, necessarily, but hopes.

My friend Sherri may come up in a few months. I talked to her tonight. 'Twould be most cool.

More people read my blog than I thought. When I don't update, people start emailing, or calling me, or asking about it. Go figure. It's not like I have anything to say. Of course, I check my friend's blogs several times a day. But we know I have no life.

Anyway, if you want to see my new short hair/clean cut look, either email me, and I'll send you pics, or check back onto my website home page every once in awhile. I'm going to try to change them out on a regular basis.

Some old ladies were flashing everybody at work tonight. It wasn't arousing to anybody (at least, any guys under 60, and I question that), but I thought it was pretty cool, anyway. I mean, these old ladies were still confident in themselves, and out to have a good time. When I'm that age, I won't be flashing anybody (hell, I wouldn't do that to anybody NOW!), but I hope I have that lack of dignity. It would suck for me to acquire dignity along the way.

Well, talk to you all soon.

Well, it's nice to be able to post again. They redesigned everything at blogger, and it won't work with Netscape now. So I've been unable to blog for awhile.

It works with Internet Explorer, which is good, I suppose. But it means I have to use a Microsoft product, and I have a deep and abiding hatred for all things Microsoft.

Oh well, not much in the news here; other than my microphone getting stolen, and the top of my car getting slashed. That's the problem with working around drunk people; sometimes they do stupid things. But it's always something.

Katie's visit is getting closer; I'm really looking forward to it. She wants to bring along her younger sister, though, which would interfere with my nefarious seduction schemes (and no, I'm not smooth enough to seduce sisters, not since I was 16). Oh well, I'm sure her boyfriend would've objected anyway. By the way, Katie, if you're reading this, I'm just kidding.

I've got one friend who has sworn off drinking, smoking, and sex. The smoking I understand. The rest? Why live?

I've got one friend who's finally ready to leave her husband. I'm not usually much for cheering on the breakup of marriages, but in this case, it's about damn time. Of course, she's not leaving until Friday, so we'll see whether she can keep her resolve that long. I sure hope so. Once she gets out of the situation she's in, she's never going to believe she stayed as long as she did.

Another friend thinks she might be pregnant (no, it's NOT mine, not a chance, you don't even need to ask). Protection, people! It's a great concept!

It's about time we have a black president. Not for racial reasons (well, normal ones, that is). But I realized that every president since Lincoln has no sense of style. We need a black man with some pimpin' style to be in the Oval Office. Just not Snoop Dogg. He's scrawnier than I am. But all these white guys with the dark suits... It's boring as hell. White guys (straight ones, at least) just have no since of style. It's not our fault; it's like dancing. We can't do it. Why not just admit it? I don't think whites are superior to blacks, or asians are smarter, or hispanics don't work, or any of those incredibly lame stereotypes. They're ridiculous.

But I've never seen a white boy dance well, and I've never seen one with any real fashion sense.

I'd vote for Andre3000 and Big Boi in a heartbeat. And I don't care what their political views are; I'd respect them more than Bush and Kerry.

Well, that's enough for now. Stay in touch!

Jess

pianoman@jessmills.com

Well, everybody's talking about the whole "gay marriage" issue. What I don't hear anybody doing is actually looking at the root issue; what business does the government have with marriage?

I know, I know, some people will point out the obvious issues of property and children, and say marriage is what protects and defines your rights concerning those issues. But that's somewhat misleading. People live with each other and have children outside of marriage on a fairly regular basis. Perhaps this was shocking fifty years ago, but it's not even yawn-worthy now.

I say there ought to be contracts available through the government concerning property rights of couples (or groups of three or more, if they so desire). Let them be called "civil unions" or "life-partner contracts" or even "legal shackles" if they so desire. Let them be binding legal contracts. Hell, we could even make some non-permanent ones, for those who don't want to deal with permanence.

Let there be laws concerning the rights of children, and the obligations of those who create them and those who raise them.

Then, let marriage be a completely religious thing. If you're a Baptist, and you think homosexuals and polygamists shouldn't be allowed to marry - then make sure your church won't marry them! Your church will remain devout towards its beliefs, and nobody's rights are trampled.

Seriously; what concern does the government have towards marriage? If I want to marry another consenting adult, it's no business of the government's whether it's a she, a he, or even a they. For those who are concerned with my mortal soul, let them deal with it in a religious fashion, not a legal one.

"Render unto Caesar what is Caesar's, and render unto God what is God's"

In every aspect of life, we should examine whether it really is the government's business, or whether it should be dealt with in another way. The easy way out is to say "there ought to be a law" about whatever. But is that really a good thing?

I also hear a lot of people saying "there ought to be universal health care, because we have a right to it." Since when?

I do believe in universal health care for children, as I believe in a free education (although my thoughts on education are a rant for another time).

But everybody? I don't want to pay for the people who refuse to exercise, who eat poorly, who smoke, who in many, many ways don't take care of their health. And if I choose not to take care of my health, you shouldn't be obliged to pay the price, either. But that's what a universal health care system will cause. And it has bankrupted every country that's tried it. Before we think about experimenting with such a thing, howzabout we try paying off our multi-TRILLION dollar debt?

Yes, I'm obviously a libertarian. But along with freedom comes the responsibility for your actions. And it seems fewer and fewer people desire either, except in patriotic songs.

*Sigh* Bush vs. Kerry. What a joke.

Jess

Had to stop to get gas at 3:00 am right outside the French Quarter. 'Twas one of the first times I've actually been frightened in years. When a whole bunch of big scary guys are telling you you're going to give them a ride... But no, I didn't. I actually made friends with some of them; they said they're going to come check me out at Pat O'Brien's.

Work on the apartment is going slowly, but surely. I'm in the phase where I'm ripping out things. Always fun.

One friend had to cancel her trip out here, but Katie is still planning on making it out. I'm looking forward to that; she was a blast the one chance I've had to really hang out with her. And this time, there will be alcohol involved. But that's a month away from now, so I'll have to be patient.

And of course I'm trying to get Anna out here again. But her schedule's still in limbo.

Well, I'm going to go to bed. If you want to, write me - I'm actually staying in touch with some of my friends more now that I'm farther away! Figure that one out!

Jess

Well, life continues its merry twists and turns. I thought I was going to get ahead this paycheck. Then I went to get my Louisiana license plates, and they said (after waiting 3 hours in line) "That'll be $403.05. Cash or check?"

I've been hearing some great pick-up lines since I've been here. Lines like:
"Excuse me, do you have the time?" "Do you have the energy?"
"Are you free tonight or will it cost me?"
"Excuse me, ma'am, is that dress felt? Would you like it to be?"

The scariest thing is that I've seen some of them work. And I need to double check, but I think they're all from a pick-up lines website, www.linesthataregood.com - go figure. Even bad taste is online. Wait, that's why I've got a website!

"I think I could fall madly in bed with you."

I found a little apartment in the Vieux Carre. It's a fixer-upper. And I really enjoy doing that. I'll be spending today crawling around in the attic, checking out the insulation possibilities. It's only a block from Pat O'Brien's, so the location is ideal.

"If your right leg was Christmas and your left leg was Easter, would you let me spend some time up between the holidays?"

Well, Monica is in love with an Air Force guy (this week, at least), Katie's got a new boyfriend (one that's worried about me - hah! He obviously hasn't met me), Anna's husband is actually showing signs of removing his cranium from his rectal orifice, and I haven't heard from Lynnette for a little while, which usually means she's happy with her man. It's all good; I'm just glad it's not me, 'cause I'm too poor to be falling in love. Say what you will, if you're a guy, women are expensive.

"That's a nice shirt. Can I talk you out of it?"

Well, I'm off to play handy-man. Yup, that's good old studly carpenterman Jess hisself.

Talk atcha soon (sooner if you write to me)

Jester

pianoman@jessmills.com

Well, my friend Julie is about to head on out of town. 'Twas fun, and we'll have to have a repeat visit sometime.

My website is STILL down, and they keep telling me "it will be back up in 24 hours." I guess they didn't specify WHICH 24 hours, so I can't call them liars...

I learned today that talking on your cell phone in the rain just isn't cool. I'm going to have to take it into the shop tomorrow. Oh well. I needed to get a New Orleans area code, anyway...

Well, I'm going to take a quick nap before I drop Julie off at the airport. Keep writing to me, and I'll keep writing back with ever-so-clever responses. Or maybe form letters, depending on whether or not I actually like you...

Jester