Well, life continues its merry twists and turns. I thought I was going to get ahead this paycheck. Then I went to get my Louisiana license plates, and they said (after waiting 3 hours in line) "That'll be $403.05. Cash or check?"

I've been hearing some great pick-up lines since I've been here. Lines like:
"Excuse me, do you have the time?" "Do you have the energy?"
"Are you free tonight or will it cost me?"
"Excuse me, ma'am, is that dress felt? Would you like it to be?"

The scariest thing is that I've seen some of them work. And I need to double check, but I think they're all from a pick-up lines website, www.linesthataregood.com - go figure. Even bad taste is online. Wait, that's why I've got a website!

"I think I could fall madly in bed with you."

I found a little apartment in the Vieux Carre. It's a fixer-upper. And I really enjoy doing that. I'll be spending today crawling around in the attic, checking out the insulation possibilities. It's only a block from Pat O'Brien's, so the location is ideal.

"If your right leg was Christmas and your left leg was Easter, would you let me spend some time up between the holidays?"

Well, Monica is in love with an Air Force guy (this week, at least), Katie's got a new boyfriend (one that's worried about me - hah! He obviously hasn't met me), Anna's husband is actually showing signs of removing his cranium from his rectal orifice, and I haven't heard from Lynnette for a little while, which usually means she's happy with her man. It's all good; I'm just glad it's not me, 'cause I'm too poor to be falling in love. Say what you will, if you're a guy, women are expensive.

"That's a nice shirt. Can I talk you out of it?"

Well, I'm off to play handy-man. Yup, that's good old studly carpenterman Jess hisself.

Talk atcha soon (sooner if you write to me)

Jester

pianoman@jessmills.com